— Special “Political Plunder” E-dition —
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Take Me, Mandingo!
~~ Only a day after The Blower exclusively reported that both Steve Chabothead and That Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Tax-and-Spend RINO Bitch Mean Jean “Hoffman” Schmidt had twelve (count ‘em) pork-barrel projects in the
2008 Congressional Pig Book, the Fishwrap defended the practice with Jeff Franko’s front-page photo of TLPMOT&SRB getting ready to show Cincinnati’s Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory what it would be like to have sex with a woman on his recent over-taxed payer funded trip to Washington to lobby for more wasteful tax-and-spend projects for the Queen City.~~ Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Will Rogers’ “The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.”
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Speaking of wasteful taxing-and-spending, in Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Donald Murphy, over-paid CEO of the Empty Uppity Oprah Winfrey Campaigning for Obama, Under-funded, Ugly-ass Poorly-Planned Unnagraown Rayroe Museum Not-so-Free-dom Center, and Papa Pepper, Board Chairman of the White Guilt Center, in conjunction with their lobbyist buddies at State Street Consultants, are inviting Ohio State Rep-tiles on the take to attend a reception at State Street offices in Columbus on April 15. Does anybody besides the Blower see the perverse irony in that date?~~ Whistleblower Senior National Political Analyst Britt Humus says Reuters is reporting that John Edwards says he would not accept the VP nomination, nor would offer it to him, and under any circumstance, nobody really gave a big rat’s ass. Then Humus showed us a copy of
John McCain’s “3 AM Ad.” And on Scrappleface, Scott Ott reports 81% Say US on Wrong Track, but 48% to Stay Anyway.~~ With only 213 more days till the November Elections, incoming Hamilton County GOP Party Boss Alex Triantafilou (pronounced Alex) used his blog to take
a shot at Odd Todd Opportune, who never was considered much of a lawyer himself, for calling for “tracking” of Judges’ bonds without all the facts. Former Temporary Hamilton County RINO Party Boss George Vincent never would’ve said a word.~~ Our Clermont Crusader says the Maupin family is planning a small, tasteful, private remembrance for their Fallen Hero, but as yet they have not announced the date for their 24-hour visitation and vigil at the Union Township Civic Center, where with the news media’s help, hundreds of thousands of people are expected to show up. Clermont County Commissioner Bob "Flag Tie" Proud has said that he is the person who declared next Wednesday Matt Maupin Day in Clermont County. While Bob says he does not want the funeral to be political, any calls from the media about the event can be directed to his re-election office. Never missing a beat, Mean Jean Schmidt has announced she will be taking time away from her photo-ops in Washington with Mayor Mark Mallory to attend the funeral where she surely will not present the family with yet another special flag she had flown over the capitol in Matt Maupin's honor. Former U.S. Trade Representative and Former Congressman Rob "Fighting to Help McCain Forget I Almost Gave Away Control Of Our Ports to Saudia Arabia" Portman has said that he plans to attend the funeral as well to remind people that he is still interested in running for Governor, Attorney General or any other job that will help his Puppet Pundit Bob Novak keep mentioning his name in the media.
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There is no doubt that Clermont County will be covered with yellow ribbons in Matt Maupin's honor next week, and rightly so. We just hope that all of the crooked cronies and other politicians out there have the ability to exercise restraint and not remind us of the media whores they really are.~~
Now if you’d like to read something about some thoughtful politicians for a change, we have a story about Revered Former Congressman Bob McEwen helping lead a discussion at the Stennis Center for Public Service in Arizona on Monday.~~ Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1792, President George Washington exercised thee first presidential veto. Real Republicans are still waiting for Dubya to get with the program.
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Fishwrap readers might want to check their bills carefully -- Our current subscription period overlaps our renewal period BACKWARD by a week, thus billing for the same newspaper TWICE! The customer service representative initially said it was because we had put a "vacation hold" on the newspaper (which is something we DIDN"T do, and in any case this would have ADVANCED the renewal period rather than RETRACTED it), then blamed the double-billing on a "computer error" but didn't say whether this would automatically be corrected on all accounts affected, or whether subscribers would have to call in and complain in order to get the correction. This isn't the first time this has happened on our account. Admittedly, double-billing for one newspaper isn't a major problem, unless you multiply that amount by the number of affected subscribers who aren't aware of the problem and don't bother to call in and get the correction! Where’s one of those greedy class-action trial lawyers when you really need one?~~ Finally, Alternative Life-styles Columnists Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis still wonder why the only Hamilton County High Schools celebrating Happy Homo Day on April 25 sponsored by McDonald’s include Anderson, Cincinnati Country Day, Finneytown, Indian Hill, Loveland, Oak Hills, St. Xavier, Walnut Hills, Western Hills, and Wyoming. Don’t the other schools realize homosexuality is a worthy lifestyle; that it has few or no risks; that some people are "born" homosexual, including students who never would have thought of such gross activities without teachers to tell them it was OK; and that those who oppose this behavior are hateful and uninformed?
Bluegrass Bluebloods
~~ Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says now that the legislative royal rumble is over, and although Kentucky has been a free state since 1776, Kentucky has now anointed a new sovereign – King David Williams. The Courier-Journal has just named him
“Rex Repugnant” as he has stifled and bullied his way into the top chair in Kentucky ’s government. God help us!~~
When King David holds court, his court jesters include Jack Deadwood, Demon Nay Thayer, Katie “Bug Up Her Ass” Stine and the Alzheimer’s trucker, Dick Roeding.~~
The CamBoozler says he is receiving calls from a lot of Kentucky voters asking how a state with a DemocRAT Governor and a DemocRAT controlled House of Representatives can approve a budget that was written by the Republican controlled Senate. Ken said voters should remember how much over-taxed payers’ money they save when we have a divided government.~~ Each week when the cyber edition of
“This Week in Kenton Circuit Court” comes out, The Blower staff loves looking at the pictures of all those defendants our good buddy E. Rob Sanders is sending to the slammer. Have you ever seen such a hideous group of people in your life?~~ Over at the Kenton County Escape Center, Terry “The Smiling Jailer” Carl says he likes this picture of a tattooed inmate. Is this guy ever popular!
~~ A Boone County resident said his neighbor (who is in the real estate business) said if you really want to see how much your property devalued, just let the Judge talk you into placing on your deed that you now have a deeded walking trail through your property. They them remember to mention it would be horses doing the walking?
~~ Senator Dick Roeding said he is looking forward to retirement and finding out just how bad off that retirement system is. Judge Defective Drees said the building business is so bad he may be forced to ask Kenton County for his pay this year. The Over-taxed payers of Kenton County said OK, since they now have a reason to vote him out of office.
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Ken CamBoo said if you think the resignation of the mayor and the city administrator of Ft. Wright was a shock, wait until you see all the politicians in Northern Kentucky who bail out, now that the Fishwrap has published that the pension crisis is over. What politician in his right mind is going to try to raise taxes with all the elections coming up in the near future?~~
An I-75 commuter wrote the Blower to ask if that is a new “For Sale” sign on the old Bavarian Brewery Building at 12th and Martin Luther King Blvd. Mr. Yung, you should have tried to get them to hold off changing the name of that street until the deal was done. The Blower told you nothing good would ever come of that street after the name change.~~
An average white guy from Kentucky wrote The Blower to suggest that the Governor may want to consider raising the license fee on preachers like Obama’s pastor who spew “Hate America” sermons, since that business seems to be quite profitable.~~
Horny from Hebron said he could see where those DemocRATS were headed when they tried to tax some of the service industries. He said first they approve gambling and prostitution and then they come back and put a 6% tax on it.~~
An uninformed voter wrote to ask The Blower if we would perform a public service by publishing who the County Judges, Mayors, and City and County Commissioners will be supporting in the upcoming primary elections. That way the over-taxed payers would know for sure who not to vote for.~~
A local precinct captain said he has a few hundred campaign signs from a Republican who was defeated in the last election. If there is a DemocRAT who is pretty sure he or she (and especially she) is not going to win this time around, you can buy these signs for $.50 apiece and turn them inside out and reuse them. If anyone accuses you of being cheap, you can always say you are a Green Candidate.~~ There are only 45 more until days will our Bluegrass Primary Elections on May 20, but the only time we hear anything about it is when our former Pants-Dropper-in-Chief Bill Clinton comes in to campaign for Hillary.
~~ Finally, Flashlight Theatre producer Mike Sadouskas forgot to send us the promo for tonight’s program airing at midnight on Channel 22. But one thing’s for sure, the broadcast will include Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane and the guys doing their award-winning
Flashlight Theatre Music Video.
POLITICAL PLUNDER HOT LINE
e-mail your egregious examples today.Some vile-and-disgusting items in today's Blower
were sent in by our equally vile-and-disgusting subscribersThe Special Whistleblower Insiders Edition is by invitation only.
Link of the Day Probably not showing tonight on Flashlight Theatre
