Today we have the top ten things The Whistleblower overheard Friday night at the big Hamilton County RINO Party’s “Lincoln and Reagan Are Turning Over in Their Graves Because of What We’ve Done to Their Party” Dinner at Paul Brown Stadium:

10. “Look at all the RINOs! No self-respecting

Conservative would be caught dead here.”

9. “Did Mike Allen bring Boinking Becky again

this year?”

8. “Isn’t that Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka sitting on the dais?”

7. “What time are they giving Odd Todd Opportune his award?”

6. “Who's responsible for the Party's crappy web site?”

5. “Do you think Temporary Party Boss George Vincent will explain his support for the Senile Sheriff’s Super-Sized Jail Tax Scam?”

4. “Is Portman charging sales tax on those copies of his book he's selling out in the hall?”

3. “Which floozie did P-P-P-Pat DeWhine show up with tonight?”

2. “Did Schnozzy Heimlich really see his shadow on Ground Hog’s Day?”

~~ Did the Whistleblower actually cover the Hamilton County RINO Party’s “Lincoln and Reagan Are Turning Over in Their Graves Because of What We’ve Done to Their Party” Dinner at the Paul Brown Stadium on Friday night? You bet! As the publication of record for all the political scrambling, speculation, mud-slinging, and back-stabbing in Ohio ’s Second District, our readers know to expect nothing less.

~~ Temporary Chairman for Life George Vincent received a very cool reception when he addressed the crowd and stressed the need for party unity. Plenty of people are still angry about “The Deal” he made with Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka and the scary thing for George is that the people who showed up are supposed to be the party loyalists. Hundreds of real conservatives stayed away. The audience was filled with people who usually ask “how high?” when the Chairman says “jump!” Tonight, when he said jump, they were looking at their watches. Lincoln or Reagan would have absolutely jumped— out the window if they knew what had happened to their party.

~~ Temporary Chairman for Life George Vincent received a very cool reception when he addressed the crowd and stressed the need for party unity. Plenty of people are still angry about “The Deal” he made with Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka and the scary thing for George is that the people who showed up are supposed to be the party loyalists. Hundreds of real conservatives stayed away. The audience was filled with people who usually ask “how high?” when the Chairman says “jump!” Tonight, when he said jump, they were looking at their watches. Lincoln or Reagan would have absolutely jumped— out the window if they knew what had happened to their party.

~~ Rob “Fighting for Failed Legacies” Portman was a little better-received. His hair has turned quite gray, and we’re sure it has nothing to do with the stress of seeing what a sideshow freak his hand-picked successor has turned the district into. Portman actually mentioned the name John McCain. That was probably because the McCain-Feingold-inspired 527 groups never targeted him when he was carrying that district with 72% of the vote.

~~ Barry Jackson, head of the White House Office of Strategery, spoke for about 45 minutes. 45 minutes is a long time to listen to someone with the charisma of a rock drone on about party unity and what a disaster it will be for the Supreme Court, our taxes, and national security if the DemocRAT wins. Usually the speaker gets a Standing O, but this time it was more like a stretch-and-piss break. Never mind that the GOP wouldn’t be in this mess if they had actually governed like conservatives and expect Real Republicans to rally around a candidate who is anything but. At least we know what we’re getting with McCain. The last time they told us the nominee was a real conservative and we got the current big-spending President.

~~ The best part at these dinners is the people-watching. With far fewer people, it made the watching easier. Conservative Cutie Maggie Nafziger was smoking hot as ever. Alas, the other Conservative Cuties, Conservative Council Aide Christa Criddle, Conservative Colerain Fiscal Officer Heather Harlow, and Conservative State Auditor Mary Taylor are all married.

~~ With only four attractive females in the joint, not counting the upstairs private-reception bartender, one’s attention turned to people-watching the rest of the crowd. Watching the party faithful interact with candidates in contested primaries pretend to like the people talking to them. Both the candidate and the activist know full well that the activist is supporting the candidate’s opponent, but pleasantries must be made. A state representative, for example, might tell a township or city elected official he’s doing a great job, but both know that the senator will work like crazy to make sure someone else gets the nod the next time a vacancy opens up. The smoke-filled room may be illegal in Ohio , but there was plenty of smoke being blown up people’s rear ends. There is so much backstabbing going on at these events that next year they should hold it on March 15, AKA the Ides of March.

~~ But really the night belonged to Ben-Gal Becky. BGB got to introduce the elected oafs and described everyone living east of I-71, including That Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Tax-and-Spend RINO Bitch Mean Jean “Hoffman” Schmidt, who lives in Clermont County , as her friend and “neighbor.” We’re surprised she didn’t introduce State Auditor of Mary Taylor, who’s from Akron , as a “neighbor” too. If BGB really had all these “neighbors,” she would have done more carpet-bagging than anyone, including BGB, ever accused Revered Former Congressman Bob McEwen of doing. BGB introduced Chabot. BGB introduced Schmidt (with far less applause). Schmidt, who was not originally on the agenda, interrupted the dinner to present BGB a meaningless award and used it as an opportunity to grandstand to the crowd. BGB introduced Mary Taylor. (In an amazing break from the historic norm, the party awarded real actual conservatives, people who have actually publicly opposed tax increases, the H.C. “Buck Niehoff” Award.)

~~ Republicans haven’t been able to find BGB with a compass and flashlight until this year when she happens to be running for office. Coincidence? We think not.

Speaking of Fecklessness at the Fishwrap, with only 23 till Ohio ’s Congressional Primary Elections on March 4, the Brinkman campaign wrote the flowing letter to Skaggie Maggie’s Idiotorial Page Editor David Wells to ask about the upcoming endorsement interviews:

In his response, Skaggie Maggie ’s Totally Discredited Idiotorial Page Editor chose not to answer the first three questions, and came up with this obfuscation on the fourth. Check your Funk and Wagnalls, Whistleblower fans, the word “obfuscation” means he freaking lied!

~~ Our Wulsin Watchers says Trashy DemocRAT Icky Vicky Wulsin (Millionaire-Indian Hill) has no scruples, no honor and stops at nothing to advance herself. Her opponent's father, renowned Judge Robert Black died on Thursday and Icky Vicky then sent out fundraising letters denigrating the Black family and made a horrible phone call on Friday to the judge's elderly sister, in her grief, asking Judge Black's sister to vote for Wulsin.

~~ Last week we told you about ditzy DemocRAT Icky Vicky Wulsin whose dog (yes, the one she used in photos for publicity purposes) had a large tumor on its side and Icky wouldn't take the dog to the vet because she didn't want to pay the expense. Let's compare that to her opponent Steve Black. Nevasha, who lives nearby, says Black has a beloved family dog of indeterminate breed; the dog is getting up in years and has diabetes. The Blacks get specialized food for the dog, take her regularly to the vet and give the dog two necessary insulin shots every day. It's been said you can judge the character of a person by the way he treats his dog.

~~ The League of Women Vipers reached a new low last Thursday evening at UC-Clermont when the biased bitches knowingly asked a specific question to our beacon of truth and honesty, Archie "Bunker" Wilson . Oddly, no other candidate on the panel was asked such a directed question. The scam was revealed when Dough Boy Ed Humphrey and "Lie n' Deny" Commissioner Mary Walker each had, before them, a prepared written rebuttal. Our boy Archie handled this set-up with aplomb. The finger prints of Judy "Butt Monkey" Kocica and Mean Jean Schmidt's eviler sister Jennifer Black were all over this attempted "Gang Shack." People in the audience at UC-Clermont were commenting that Dough Boy Ed and ethically challenged Mary Walker are becoming quite the item.

~~ Speaking of public service (the kind mentioned in Huggable Howard’s whitewash of the Mendacious Mallory Family), let’s review how much all that Public Service is costing the over-taxed payeres each year. So far we have our Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory’s $120,000 stipend, Judge William Mallory, Jr.’s annual salary of $121,350, and Municipal Court Judge D wayne Mallory’s over $111,000 per year, along with Dale for Sale Mallory’s $60,528 ill gotten gains for whatever it is he does at the Ohio State House and the more than $100,000 over-taxed payers are shelling out for Scottie to guard the Mt; Airy Fairy. Check our math folks, we’re already over $500,000-per-year adding up all that altruism, and we’re not done yet.

~~ At Wednesday night’s Anderson Township Republican Club meeting, the State Rep-tile wannabe who is trying to fill legendary State Representative “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman 34th House District Seat in Columbus seemed to promise to take down all of his illegally placed yard signs in the public right of way, but they were all over the place at Friday night’s RINO Party dinner at Paul Stadium, along with crappy flyers stuck under the windshield wipers on every car, which will be littering the parking lot for months to come.

~~ Finally, our Colerain Correspondent says “Passed Around” Patty Clancy was so at Thursday night’s meeting being passed around as usual, and CC is not sure who gave CH Snitch at 1000 Main Street the false information that appeared in Saturday’s Blower and wonders if somebody is trying to damage our credibility. Unfortunately, that would be difficult, since we figure we don’t have any credibility to begin with.

~~ Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says he has received many complaints that the Bluegrass Blower isn’t doing its part to promote Black History Month. We hope this picture will remedy that situation.

~~ The NoKY Republican Chamber of Commerce and their henchmen (and women) all went to Frankfort Thursday to whine and bitch about being cut out of the DemocRAT Governor's budget (duh), and to try to schmooze their remaining few Republican friends.

~~ On Thursday evening, they threw another wild drinking bash for all the legislators and their lobbyists and girlfriends. NoKY's own Mrs. Robinson was there in all her glory and was beaming as attention was coming from many of NoKY's young attorneys.

~~ And boy, did the new NoKY House Rep., Alecia What’s-her-name Trooper Babe squeeze some hands. She was shaking everybody’s hands so hard, they were packing them on ice. That trooper babe has some serious muscles. And how much coffee does she drink during the day? However much it is, they need to cut her off.

~~ Jack Deadwood had his big moment on the Senate floor on Thursday as he defended his important abortion bill - making young, scared, single, poor pregnant women look at an ultrasound of their uterus before they can even talk about having an abortion. Jack pointed to his little feet lapel pin and said “This could have been me if some bitch would have had me sucked out of the womb.”

At a boy Jack - keep pushing those women down.

~~ This will be the speech given by each State Reptile and Senile Senator when Patsy Crowley asks them why they voted to allow their constituents to vote on gambling in Kentucky . “Gambling and Prostitution go hand and hand, if you know what I mean. I am personally against gambling and prostitution, but I feel that I owe it to my constituents to allow them to have a vote on the issue. The amount of money I received from those interested in having gambling in Kentucky had no influence in how I voted. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.”

~~ The Sixth grader who wrote the Blower earlier this week and asked for additional personal and vacation time off because the top man in the Department of Education was requesting it said now that the top guy has changed his mind and no longer believes he deserves more time, she is asking that her demands be rescinded. She said she only requested the time off because she wanted to remain part of the “No Child Left Behind” Program.

~~ Our Vanilla Hills Vigilante asked us to advise Vanilla Hills residents about paying their new $40 license fee automobile tax.

1. When paying in person, please go to City Building #2, the recently constructed new city building. City Building # 1 is the original building now use for other city business.

2. Please stop asking why we built a new additional new city building when we did not have the money for ongoing basic road repairs.

3. Please stop asking if we are going to decrease spending by 12% in accordance with the new state budget directives. We are not part of the state government and have no plans on reducing spending. We balance our budget through tax increases.

4. Stop calling the Vanilla Hills Mayor and Council Tax-and-Spend DemocRATS. They are Tax- and-Spend Republicans.

5. All complaints should be forwarded to the top Tax-and-Spend Republican Mayor Tax-and- Spendouskas. He can be located at City Building # 1.

~~ Finally, Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1996 world chess champion Gary Kasparov lost the first game of a six-game match against Deep Blue, an IBM computer capable of evaluating 200 million moves per second. “That’s no big deal,” says Will “The Thrill” Terwort. “One time in college I played 93 games of chess simultaneous and I lost every dame!”

The Whistleblower's 56th Annual Seediest Kids of All Campaign (not associated with the failed United Way ) is underway.

Were featuring some truly inspirational stories about the waifs and urchins we claim to have helped in Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky, just so you'll believe we give a rat's ass.

Why don't we have a more traditional holiday guilt campaign like the rest of the news media? No charity made our publisher its president in exchange for free publicity and our endorsement, we don't have a fat weatherman turned radio talk-show host who was never actually convicted of beating up his girlfriend, and all the really good dead celebrities other than Harriet Beecher Stowe "Clean Gene" Ruehlmann, and “BeanBall Jim” Bunning have already been taken.

Eldon Pudpuller was a very troubled 12-year-old lad who ran up a whopping $38,000 telephone bill last month making calls to 1-900 phone-sex lines, all because “Masturbating Mike” Barrett was sworn in as a Federal judge before whacking off could be combined with show-and-tell in the public schools. The NoKY ComPost got hold of the story, and soon none of the Pudpullers could show their faces in public. So the Seediest Kids of All sent over tapes of calls to the same phone sex lines made by guys who used to work at Vanilla Hills City Hall . Now Eldon listens to grown-ups talking dirty any time he wants and it doesn’t cost his family a dime. He’s learning a lot about city government at the same time. He’s studying hard in school and when he grows up, he wants to be a public official too. Just like Vanilla Hills Mayor “Mischievous Mike” Sadouskas. The entire Pudpuller family is grateful to the Seediest Kids of All, but it’s you they really have to thank, because it’s your guilt throughout the year which makes it all possible.