— Special “More DemocRAT Sex Scandals” E-dition —

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Returning Trust to Ohio Government

In Columbus , Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Depraved DemocRAT Attorney General Marc Dann had a pretty bad day on Friday when the fecal matter hit the oscillator in Dann’s Pajama-gate Scandal. In brief, he had to fire two aides, two others quit, he admits having sex with one of the quitting employees, and his office is still being investigated for sexual harassment charges. All in all, it was not a very good day. Or as Our Quote for Today Committee chose, “Jesus had a better Good Friday.” Let’s check his record.

Remember when Dann encountered a reporter who had written that his daughter had received a job in the office of another statewide DemocRAT, he used the “F-Bomb.” Just imagine what he really wants to say to the next reporter he sees.

We remember what Dann the Pajama Man said when he was campaigning for office: "When Ted Strickland is governor in January ... I want you to do something that Republicans wouldn't ask their supporters to do," Dann said. "Will you hold us to a higher standard of conduct?”

No wonder Ohio Republicans are demanding Dann’s resignation. Like that’s ever going to happen. In Dann’s statement, he said “I must do everything I possibly can to repair the negative reflection that has been cast upon the great lawyers, administrative staff and law enforcers hired in the past 16 months and who were here when I took office.” Then he said, “I will work tirelessly to re-earn the public’s trust, and I did not have sex with that woman, Ms. Lewinsky.” That doesn’t sound much like any resignation we’ve ever heard.

Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says with the Indiana Primary coming up on Tuesday, that video showing what Clinton advisers really think of Hoosiers is just starting to hurt. No wonder Zogby is now reporting that Obama is tied with Hillary in Indiana . And is The Blower the only one that knows about McCain’s Indian Hill fund-raiser in late June? We wonder if John Barrett has heard about it yet.

Thursday, the Blower predicted another Rascally Republican from Butler County was about to get slammed, and in Friday’s Fishwrap, we saw that the FBI last week visited offices in Butler County to request all mortgages and deeds related to a home owned by Children Services Director Mike Fox. Coincidence? We think not.

Hamilton County Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters says Megan Shanahan did such a fabulous job as his Public Information Officer by keeping the national press away from The JayWalker after Deters’ best buddy Bill Cunningham embarrassed the Hamilton Count Republican Party at the McCain rally, our feisty female prosecutrix will now get to return to the Major Case Squad, where in Hamilton County’s War on Crime, the worst criminal offenders are persecuted. The Blower will be following her cases closely.

When the “We Demand” Gang holds its big press conference on the front steps of Cincinnati City Hall, at noon on Monday, May 5, 2008, to announce their unified support for a major imitative for Cincinnati (whatever the hell that means), word is it’s got something to do with their Red Light Camera Petitions.

How many yoofs have been arrested since January 2008 along the crack track of the proposed Trolley Folly through the Killing Fields of Over-the-Rhine? You won’t believe the number. Word is there was a total of 820 arrests for a combination of felonies and misdemeanors. And with the City of Cincinnati now remembering to pay $65-per-day whenever one of their poor misunderstood yoofs gets his Black ass arrested, that would mean big bucks for Hamilton County over-taxed payers. And how about our Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory’s hand-picked Chocolate Doughboy City Mangler Milton Do-honey “offer” to pay the County $100,000 to cover the pass seven years, when it’s estimated the annual tab is way over $200,000? We’re calling bullshit on that! The City should pay exactly what it owes—not one dollar more and not one dollar less. And don’t forget the interest.

And before you go giving P-P-P-Pat DeWhine all that credit for discovering the error, Just Wondering in Cleves says,

“Just remember where the DeWhiner was when the City stopped paying.” As The Blower recalls, he was one of the Nine Fine Clowns on Cincinnati ’s City Clown-cil.

Meanwhile with only 185 more days till the November Elections, at today’s First Annual RINO-free Campaign School from 9 A.M. to 4 P.M. at the Ramada Inn at 800 West Eighth Street in Cincinnati, where the Hamilton County Republican Party guarantees attendees double their money back if they don’t win their next election, one thing’s for sure—Joe “I Did Not Have Sex With That Woman, Mean Jean” Braun won’t be teaching any of the classes. Even though his candidates have won 16 races in Clermont County , he will never be forgiven for # 14. That’s when he saddled the Second Congressional District with Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Tax-and-Spend RINO Bitch Mean Jean “Hoffman” Schmidt, still the most embarrassing elected official in Southwest Ohio history (including Jerry Springer).

It’s been six days since the historic Maupin Funeral Fiasco, and not a single member of the mendacious news media (especially Joe Wessels publisher and Executive Director at CinDaily.com, TV 5’s Sandra and Sheree and their two military analysts, along with Huggable Howard and Barrett J. Brunsman at the Fishwrap) has reported the cost of all that Hype, who got the money, and who’s footing the bill.

It’s also been six days and all those Yellow Ribbons are still up along the Matt Maupin Memorial Highway, and Whistleblower Truth Squad Investigative Reporter Fearless Ferrett says the Yellow Ribbon Litter Removal Hot Line has now assigned more operators to handle your calls (at 513-791-0981). Those hideous yellow yard signs you still see littering the landscape from the March GOP Primary Campaign should be delivered to Delev and Williams Attorneys, 1050 Delta Avenue, Suite 1000.

Bluegrass Buggerers

Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says fed up NKU alumni wonder what the administration means when it says it must have same sex health benefits to attract a better worker? Does this mean our old diplomas really were from a No-Knowledge State College? Where do all those folks go to get a refund?

With only 17 more days till the Bluegrass Primaries on May 20, as all Whistleblower readers know, The Blower (unlike the Fishwrap) is not afraid to report a scandal. Sometimes the Blower releases names, as in the case where money was taken from a civic club and the Blower had the story shortly after the thief took the first few bucks to go to the casinos. There are times the Blower likes to tease the audience, such as the case of the “Mrs. Robinson” operating during the legislative session this year. Now The Blower has received information that the 11th Senate Race is about to get really juicy. Stay tuned.

Patsy Crowley reported on his blog this week that the Obama backers are headed for the Derby . Do you think they still expect the Queen to show up again?

Ken CamBoo said he has never seen the Blower do a poll, but he would sure like them to do one to see how many Blower readers would vote that the guilty white political analyst for the Fishwrap who lives in the white guilt section of Ft. Thomas along with the other white guilt editors of the Fishwrap will for sure endorse Barack Obama for the DemocRAT nomination for President. This guilt all started while our analyst was covering the General Assembly along with other guilty white people from the Courier Urinal and the Harold Leaker, and they heard those DemocRATS down there in the House of Representatives say they would never vote for a black guy from Chicago for President, and sure enough the first poll taken by the Urinal showed Hillary ahead 80% to 20%.

A Kenton County snitch called one of Charlie Walton’s workers and said the reason the Schickel people haven’t spent any money is that they are saving it to release all kinds of negative adds in the coming week. Maybe the Blower could ask John McCain to bring his peace pipe to Northern Kentucky and tell the Rhinos to stop all this negative stuff or maybe we just need to release some names to the Blower

It was reported that Secretary of State Trey Grayson would like to see more Kentuckians vote in this Primary election. Ken CamBoo says he believes we could increase voter turnout if we would do as they do up in the mountains and give each voter a fifth of booze. Ken said we may have to give something better than the Thunderbird Wine they give up in the mountains, but after reading in the Fishwrap the other day that our members of the Chamber of Commerce only pay an average of $12.84 and hour, maybe the Thunderbird would be OK.

The Code Enforcement Officer from Boone County wants to inform the Schickel people that if they must put up their signs in the middle of the night, they should carry a flashlight and level so they can install them straight, or the signs will get run over by the County’s four wheelers. In a related story, Judge No-Moore says he is convinced now to abandon his ideas of installing trails through everybody’s property in Boone County except his and his neighbors who showed up at the fiscal court meeting last week mad as hell about the idea. The Judge said there was an article in the Fishwrap Thursday with pictures of trails that the city of Ft Wright had installed on a God awful hillside. Could this be why the mayor and the city manager resigned a couple weeks ago?

The Northern Kentucky Editor of the Blower said a couple of regular customers at the soup kitchen on Pike St. in Covington asked him if he thought Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane could get them a picture of their idol Keith Maupin before he shaves his beard, since Kane is such a close friend of the Maupin Family?

The latest word from our covert source inside the CPC is that the shocking Flashlight Theater expose on the UFO crash site in Northern Kentucky coming this summer will do for television investigative journalism what Donald Keyhoe’s 1950 breakthrough book The Flying Saucers Are Real did for the paperback industry. You can watch beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane on Flashlight Theater Saturday nights at midnight on the Main Event Channel, Channel 22. Or, check out Mr. Kane’s vocal stylings by catching the mega-hit Flashlight Theatre Music Video.

Finally, Hurley the Historian says the father of modern political theory Niccolo Machiavelli was born in 1469, and as the Official Voice of the Conservative Agenda, The Blower says Niccolo would be proud if he saw what our local leaders were doing. Nico entered the political service of his native Florence, and today Mayor Blondie Whalen is every bit as Machiavellian as Nico ever was.

REMEMBER: If you can't improve on the news, you shouldn't even be reporting it.