![3D"cid:187015418@13102009-04DC"](3D"Whistleblower_Newswire_Wednesday_December_30_2009.mht._files/image00=)
=
— Spe=
cial
“Resolutions and Restitutions” E-dition —
=
=
=
Wednesday,
December 30, 2009
&nb=
sp;
Another obligatory year-end ritual for pandering publications i=
s a
list of local celebrity resolutions. Here's some we'd like to see:
=
"Jaywalking Joe" Deter=
s:
call murderers and rapists “scum” like I used to do in good old days.<=
/o:p>
=
Gayvenor Strickland and all thos=
e Dysfunctional
DemocRATS in Columbus: remind Ohio voters how much better off they are than
when we took office.
=
Millionaire GOP U.S. Senate cand=
idate
Rob “Fighting for Fund-raisers” Portman: keep getting suckers to contribute=
to
my campaign.<=
/o:p>
=
Feckless Fishwrappers: try to fi=
nd
some “Feck.”
=
Angry Andersonians: Wonder whate=
ver
happened to that good local government we used to enjoy.
Forest
Hills Urinal Editor, Eric Spangler: More bogus front-page polls to support =
our biased
agenda of supporting O’Brien and discrediting sitting township officials. <=
/span>
=
=
=
Demo=
-Labor
Party Boss Tim Burka: Make sure Black, liberal DemocRAT Hamilton County Jud=
ges
like Fanon Rucker sign bonds so discredited Republicans can take office.
=
=
=
Whacky
Jacky O’Brien’s Illegitimate Son Kevin, the banned broker just elected under
false pretenses: Find a way not to resign, as demanded on the “Kevin O’Brien=
Must
Resign” Website.
Greedy Hearse-Chasing,
Disgraced-DemocRAT Clinton-loving, Fen-Phen Scandal Plagued, Not-yet-Indict=
ed
Trial Attorney $tan Che$ley: buy more Republicans while their process are so
low.
Whistleblower Gossip Columnist L=
inda
Libel: Reveal the name of my next “Political Philanderer.”
Hamilton County RINO Party Boss =
Alex
T., Mall Cop GOP: concentrate on something really important like finding mo=
re
Facebook friends.
Blue Chip Young Republicans: fin=
d some
decent speakers to appear at our meetings.
That Lying Plagiarizing Meddling
Overblown Tax-and-Spend Multi-Millionaire RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch Mean Jean
Schmidt: No more ethics complaints, especially during the Primary season and
try not to piss anyone else off so my number of primary opponents this year
holds steady at two dozen.
Ohio’s First District Dumpy Demo=
cRAT
Congressman Steve Drinkhaus: Promise to cut out pork like Steve Chabothead =
used
to do.
Steve Chabothead: donate Amazing
Chabot Head royalties to Jack Atherton’s Home for the Hairless.=
Tea Partiers and Patriots at the
Cincinnati 9/12 Project: win some for the Gipper.
Devio=
us
DemocRAT Hamilton County Commissioners Odd Todd Opportune and David A. Pepp=
er,
along with Me Too, Greg Hartmann: give Hamilton County residents the kind of
government they truly deserve.
Disin=
genuous
DemocRAT Hamilton County Auditor (who was permitted to run unopposed by the
RINOs at 700 Walnut Street): Raise property taxes to help Commissioners bal=
ance
the County Budget.
The
Foreclosed Four-Flushing Philanderer Roger Ach: Never a borrower or lender =
be.
Cincinnati’s Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark
Mallory and our Nine Fine Clowns at the Plum Street Playpen: just keep tell
ourselves what a wonderful job we’re doing.
<=
!--[if gte vml 1]>
Ghizzy
Lizzy: try to find at least one Republican to support.
Brian Kelly: see how many more UC
recruits I can steal for Notre Dame.
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken
CamBoo: find just a few more good NOKY snitches.
Kentucky’s Fourth District Congr=
essman
Goof Doofus: Continue to pan Obama’s Stimulus Program as a failure while
sending out press releases crediting myself for securing all those Stimulus
Funds for projects in my districts.
Rand=
Paul:
Use my favorable showing in the polls to raise money for my US Senate campa=
ign.
=
=
Trey
Grayson: Use my opponent’s favorable showing in the polls to raise money fo=
r my
US Senate campaign.
=
Kenton
County Commonwealth Attorney E. Rob Sanders: find a big place for next year=
’s
Christmas Party.
Eric =
“Call
Me Crazy” Deters: set a record for frivolous lawsuits and judicial sanction=
s.
&nb=
sp;
Monkey
Business Boys Patsy Crowley and Jay Faucet: pass out more of our patented
Cougar Rating Buttons.
&nb=
sp;
<=
span
style=3D'mso-tab-count:1'> Cluel=
ess
Marc Wilson and Scott “Pass the Biscuits” Kimmich: 100% attendance at all
Weight Gainers meetings.
&nb=
sp;
Flash=
light
Theatre: new live shows every week featuring Beloved Whistleblower Publisher
Charles Foster Kane
&nb=
sp;
Bill =
Liquid
Plummer and Nathan “Cornbread” Smith: learn how to pronounce “inebriated” a=
t a
New Year’s Eve Party.
&nb=
sp;
<=
span
style=3D'mso-tab-count:1'> Horny in Hebron: check out those=
Wilder
Women.
Miss Vicki: publish a list of all
those Uptight Bitches in Fort Thomas who faked their orgasms on World Orgas=
ms
for Peace Day.
Boondoggle County Judge Defectiv=
e No
Moore in 2010: more favorable coverage in The
Blower.
&nb=
sp;
Our good friend Bobby Leach: e-m=
ail
more vile-and-disgusting photos to =
The
Blower.
=
=
&n=
bsp;
Whistleblower Snitches: promise =
if we
can’t say find anything nice to say about somebody, to e-mail the Blower im=
mediately!
These are the real local celebrity New Year's Resolutions. Any
other local celebrity New Year's resolutions you may see published elsewhere
are surely fake.
BROKEN NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS HOT LINE
e-mail
your best intentions today
=
<=
/i>&nbs=
p;Remember:
We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn
glad we don’t, especially Banned Broker Kevin O’Brien.
=
=
=
Some =
phony
New Year’s Resolutions items in today's Blower =
=
were =
sent
in by our equally phony New Year’s Resolutions subscribers.
![3D"HappyNewYear](3D"Whistleblower_Newswire_Wednesday_December_30_2009.mht._files/image01=)
Links=
of
the Day
New Year’s Resolution=
s
DemocRAT Candidates P=
hony New
Year’s Resolutions
Jim Carrey’s Happy Ne=
w Year
&n=
bsp;
Note: We guarantee
Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their
computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.<=
/i>
=
To be considered for =
an
e-mail subscription to The Whistleblower Newswire published eight days per
week, persons of consequence anywhere in the world may apply by e-mailing
requests to whistleblower@cinci.rr.com.=
(But persons w=
ho’ve
been found to have misrepresented themselves as consequential movers and sh=
akers
and are declared “Persons of Inconsequence” will be removed without notice.=
)
The E=
xtra
Special Whistleblower Insiders
E-dit=
ion is
by invitation only.
&=
nbsp;
Just=
say
“No” to Social Networking
=
&=
nbsp;
The Whistleblower has always been 100% commercial free, unlike members of t=
he
mendacious news media. So if you want to buy an ad on the front page, call =
The
Fishwrap.
<=
o:p>
<=
o:p>
And t=
o check
out some of the latest videos submitted, see what those politically incorre=
ct
folks at =
“Not the
Fishwrap” are doing.
<=
o:p>
Note:
people who work in government offices should be receiving The Whistleblower=
on
their home computers because we do not approve of public servants wasting t=
ime
reading this trash on over-taxed payers’ time (except when you have somethi=
ng
to snitch).
&nbs=
p;
=
Reme=
mber:
you can still be offended by the Blower on the Internet at
&nbs=
p;The Cincinnatus Standard
=
&=
nbsp;
<=
/p>
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